Offbeat comedy in which Scott must defeat his new girlfriend's seven evil exes to win her heart. The trials and tribulations of love are translated into video game language for this movie; unfortunately what that means is that we watch fight scene after fight scene, and although the film tries to make each one different and interesting, it gets very samey by the third time through. High points include a Vegan who has magic powers because "Vegans are just better than normal people"; low points include the fact that the movie never shows Ramona to be worth fighting for.
The American
George Clooney is an American hit man operating in Europe who must lay low after he narrowly escapes an attempt on his own life. Unfortunately his version of lying low includes building a custom weapon for another assassin and falling in love with the prostitute he's frequenting. The question becomes one of can he survive long enough to pull free of the life of isolation he has lived and find happiness. A film that's long on mood and atmosphere, limited in dialogue.
Forbidden Planet
Classic fifties sci fi starring the late Leslie Nielsen in one of his serious roles as the Captain of a cruiser sent to check up on a long isolated scientific mission. What he finds is a single remaining scientist and his daughter, working to uncover the mystery of an ancient and powerful alien civilization which vanished overnight. Things take a turn for the worse when the mysterious force which destroyed them returns, bent on more murder and mayhem. An intelligent story (based on Shakespeare's The Tempest) helps this film along and the trappings made it a massive influence on future science fiction. It is a little dated, though. A remake has been in the offing for some years now.
Below
A US submarine operating in the Atlantic during World War II picks up a few survivors from a British ship torpedoed days earlier. Their presence seems to trigger a string of increasingly strange events - a German destroyer that harasses them at every turn, strange noises which give away their position, odd sounds and sights witnessed by the crew... is the boat truly haunted, and if so what is driving the ghost's rage at the crew? Low budget thriller which manages some effective scares, though the story line is a little on the obvious side.
In Bruges
Two hit men are ordered to hide out in Bruge after one of them accidentally kills a young child on his first mission. This rather odd movie treads a line between grim morality tale and black humour, asking questions about just how far down a person can go before redemption becomes impossible. Worth watching.
The Expendables
Sylvester Stallone assembles his team of mercenaries to knock over a small island dictatorship backed by drug runners. Of course they find themselves squaring off against hundreds of disposable bad guys along with a handful who can give a good account of themselves. Remember when action movies had actual action in them, instead of a bunch of obvious CGI? Stallone plays it old school all the way and delivers a solid and effective piece of pure testosterone.
Jonah Hex
A bounty hunter in the old west seeks out bad guys, helped by paranormal powers. But can he save America from bad guys armed with a superweapon? The film makes little sense, the superweapon is bizarre and never explained, and in the end it's all very forgettable.
Kick Ass
So with the popularity of superheroes in movies and comics, why doesn't anybody ever suit up and try it for real? That's the question teenage Dave Lizewski asks himself, so he makes himself a super suit and starts role playing a little. Eventually he slides into trying it for real... with decidedly mixed results. The movie is a comedy, but it doesn't shy away from showing the kind of brutality that would result if a person really did tangle with hardened criminals. Controversially, it also shows a young girl both dishing out and taking the violence. Well worth a watch.
Salt
Angelina Jolie is Evelyn Salt, a trusted CIA officer- until the day a Russian agent walks in and declares that she is a double agent who will shortly assassinate the head of the Russian Federation. The CIA want to hold her for questioning, but Salt's husband has vanished and she goes on the run to find him; or is that just an excuse to run for a woman who really is a double agent after all? Angelina turns in a decent performance, though the character of Salt comes across as a little TOO superhuman to be really credible. We may see more of Ms. Salt, as the ending leaves it wide open for sequels.
Splice
Two genetic engineers are pushing the boundaries of science, creating brand new types of animal by splicing together genes from different species. Determined to see how far they can go, they splice Human DNA into the mix - and produce a creature that may change what it means to be Human. Horror movie that for once doesn't go over the top, but the places they go will make you truly squirm. Watch this one!
LA Story
Steve Martin takes an oddball look at Los Angeles through the eyes of a weather forecaster in a city where it's always hot and sunny. Can Harris find love with the help of a magical road traffic sign? Find out in this underrated little gem.
Predators
A disparate band of Humans find themselves parachuted into a dense jungle, each without any memory of how they go there. It soon becomes clear that they share one thing in common - they are all killers. When they find that the jungle is on a planet far from Earth, they realize that an alien species has brought them here with one aim - to hunt them down and kill them all. Decent action sequel that builds on the original without ever coming close to surpassing it.
Clash of the Titans
Pointless remake of the classic movie based (loosely) on Greek mythology. Unfortunately the original story is messed around enough to make most of the character's motivations rather pointless; we are left with a movie where the hero spends two hours raging at the gods, only to turn around and help them stay in power and pal up to their boss at the end, all for no particular reason. The monsters are okay for the most part, but this is a ship without any engine to drive it.
Starcrash
Renowned in movie lore as one of the single worst movies ever put on film, Starcrash combines the talents of acting giants like David Hasslehoff with special effects that look like they were slapped together by a nine year old child, all in a script that feels like it was written by said nine year old child's pet beagle. I cannot begin to describe how mind-blowingly, tremendously, uniquely bad this movie is. Amazingly, it stars Christopher Plumber - who reportedly took the role because he didn't realize the pay was in German Marks rather than US dollars, and thus thought he was being paid far more than he actually was. To his eternal credit Plumber actually turns in his usual impressive acting performance, which has the effect of emphasizing just how hilariously bad every other aspect of the film is. This is the kind of movie which can have great entertainment value as an unintentional comedy.
Devil
Five people are stranded in an elevator when it breaks down. At first it seems like an everyday event; but as time passes, strange happenings both prevent the authorities from rescuing the passengers whilst ratcheting up the tension between them. Can the devil himself really be at work, and if so why choose this particular group of people? Not a spectacular movie, this, but it's quite an effective little piece that will keep you guessing all the way to the end.
