The Picts are conducting a highly effective guerilla warfare campaign against the Romans at the northern border of the Empire. When a Roman legion marches north to deal with the problem they walk into a trap and are all but annihilated. The survivors try to rescue their leader, killing the Pict chieftain's son in the process - and a deadly pursuit begins as the Romans desperately race for home.
A fairly routine story, similar to the slew of "Romans in the north" movies that appeared a year or so back. But it's well done stuff, with some good performances. The violence is amazing - it seems like nobody ever swings a sword without hacking off a major body part!
Hudson Hawk
The movie Bruce Willis dreamed of making back when he was a bartender. Hudson Hawk is possibly the world's greatest cat burglar, newly out of jail and determined to go straight. However, he rapidly becomes a pawn in a struggle between some powerful and very violent people who are fighting over certain priceless works of art - works that contain an ancient secret that could change the whole world, and unlock limitless wealth. The movie is a slapstick comedy which deliberately aims to be absurd and over the top. You can see what it was trying for and it's sporadically funny, but to be honest it really never works and you wince far more than you laugh.
The Matador
Pierce Brosnan is a professional assassin who has lived a life of violence and easy women, with no personal contacts. Greg Kinnear is a businessman trying to end a long losing streak by pulling off a business deal. The two meet in a hotel bar and despite some awkward moments, strike up a friendship before parting ways. When Brosnan starts experiencing panic attacks his career disintegrates and he resorts to asking Kinnear for help with one last hit.
Strange little film, this, but you find yourself getting invested even as you wonder at the oddness of the characters and situations. Definitely worth a watch.
Equilibrium
After the third world war society decided that the true threat to mankind was the experience of emotion. All feeling is outlawed and the population dosed with drugs daily so they can go about their sterile lives with utter calm and composure. The Clerics are a special police force that hunt down and eliminate the few "sense offenders" and destroy anything remaining which can provoke feeling - art, music, elaborate decorations. When a trivial accident causes Cleric Preston to miss his daily drug injection he begins to find emotion stirring within him - and it's one highly trained professional killer against the system.
A well made movie with some interesting ideas - a martial art centered on gun use, for example, how come nobody ever thought of that before? But whilst it's engaging enough, you have to wonder who it was that read Orwells 1984 and though "Hmmm, what this really needs is a bunch of really cool fight scenes..."
A Fist Full of Dollars
A spaghetti western based on the Japanese movie Yojimbo sees Clint Eastwood ride into a town dominated by two rival criminal gangs. Sensing a chance to make some big money he expertly plays one side against the other, but gradually becomes involved in helping the innocent victims to regain their freedom. Superb movie which made a star of Eastwood and defined a whole genre.
For a Few Dollars More
Eastwood's man with no name returns, this time as a bounty hunter tracking down the dangerous and psychopathic head of a criminal gang. He agrees to work with Lee Van Cleef's rival bounty hunter to take on the gang, little knowing that Cleef is on a very personal vendetta. Soon the bullets are flying and the body count rising as all concerned head for a violent and bloody final showdown. A great sequel, if perhaps not quite up to the original.
The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly
This final part of the "dollars" trilogy is a prequel set during the American Civil war. Eastwood's man with no name is working with Tuco, a man wanted for an extensive list of crimes. Eastwood repeatedly "captures" Tuco and turns him in for the reward money, only to use his skills with a rifle to rescue him from his own hanging. When Tuco complains about the even split of the money Eastwood abandons him in the desert and makes off with all of the cash from their latest job. Tuco chases down and captures Eastwood, returning the favour by leading him into a brutal desert hell to die. When they chance across a dying soldier each man learns part of the location of a fortune in lost gold, and they must work together once more to recover the money. Meanwhile Lee Van Cleef's hit man is also chasing the gold in a quest which will take all three on a tour of the devastation and insanity of the war raging around them.
Transformers 2
Alien machines that can look either like cars or giant nonsensical piles of junk do battle on Earth over an ancient weapon that can blow up the sun. Why do they want to blow up the sun? That's just what evil robots want, I guess. Meanwhile slimy politicians try to sabotage the good guys, beautiful women wear skimpy outfits, horribly inappropriate racial stereotypes are thrown around, and Egypt loses half of its cultural heritage to collateral damage. It's like somebody gave $200 million to a fourteen year old child and told him to make a movie with it.
Limitless
Eddie Morra is a down on his luck sort of a guy - an aspiring writer who can't write, dependent on the charity of his girlfriend as his life winds down into failure. Then a chance meeting with his ex brother in law Vernon leads to a change - Vernon gives him a pill which will activate the unused 90% of his brain, and for 24 hours Eddie becomes an almost superhuman genius. He goes back to Vernon's for more pills, and when the man is murdered Eddie finds his stash and escapes. He is soon taking mega doses of the drug, transforming himself into a rising star in the world of finance. Unfortunately Eddie must deal with the accumulating side effects of the pills, whilst trying to avoid powerful and violent people who are determined to steal them from him.
Overall a pretty fair movie. Oddly, the message seems to be "Do drugs, they're great!"
Sucker Punch
A young woman called "Babydoll" and her sister inherit a fortune from their father, only to have their brutal stepfather threaten to kill them to gain control of the money. Babydoll tries to kill him but instead shoots her sister dead by accident. He has her committed to an insane Asylum, bribing corrupt staff to lobotomize her. The movie delves into the multi-layered fantasies Babydoll creates to insulate herself from her grim environment and plan her escape.
A surreal movie which uses the fantasy premise to serve up giant Samurai with gatling guns, zombified steampunk German soldiers, giant dragons, and much, much more. Plenty of beautiful ladies in skimpy clothing on display.
Let Me In
Owen is living a miserable childhood in the 1980s when a strange man and his even stranger daughter, Abby, move into the apartment next door. Owen and Abby gradually become friends, despite her hinting that she is not quite normal. It soon becomes clear that Abby is a vampire and her "father" is really her human helper, a man who spends his nights murdering locals and draining their blood for Abby. Owen gradually comes to accept Abby's vampiric nature and under her encouragement begins to stand up for himself against the bullies who make his life hell at school... but as things come to a head, Abby may wind up changing his life in ways more drastic and permanent than he could imagine.
A slow, thoughtful and utterly creepy tale which is far more concerned with characters and implications than monsters and gore, and one of the most intelligent horror movies of recent years.
Priest
In an alternate world Humanity has waged a centuries long war with Vampires. When it looked like the Vamps were winning Church produced the Priests - genetically engineered super soldiers who turned the tide and defeated the vampires, confining them to reservations. With the wars over for years the Church has declared the Vampire menace over and the Priests are both retired and largely despised. But when word reaches one Priest of a Vampire attack on a small settlement, he decides to defy the Church and God himself to face the old enemy once more.
A rather silly premise serves as an excuse for super guys to fight Vampire monsters. It all amounts to very little. The Vamps are pretty damn cool, though.
Brazil
In a not too distant future the world is engulfed in antiquated technology that never works right and a massive bureaucracy which stifles everybody and everything. Against this background Sam Lowry has one goal - to find and meet the woman of his dreams. Unfortunately, the grind of daily life seems determined to thwart him at every turn. Surreal movie from Terry Gilliam.
Red Riding Hood
Valerie lives in a remote village deep in the woods. Life is simple but pleasant in the village, with one exception - the wolf which eats a villager every once in a while. They have long appeased the creature by offering a sacrifice every month, but when it strikes again the townspeople come together determined to exact revenge. When a wolf-hunting priest arrives to inform them that they face no ordinary animal but rather a ferocious werewolf, things go from bad to worse.
Rango
A pet chameleon falls from his owner's car and is lost in the middle of the desert. Chancing on a town of simple desert dwelling animals struggling with a fierce drought, he realizes that he can be anything he chooses in this new place and claims to be Rango, a feared gunslinger. When he accidentally kills the hawk which is picking the townsfolk off they appoint him Sheriff - but when the town's little remaining water is stolen, Rango must solve a real life mystery.
Strange little film which is actually quite surreal and even disturbing in parts as it plays with many of the cliches of the western genre.
